Posted By Author on September 28, 2010
At 3 A.M. Ramanidada came and woke me up and told that all of us were immediately called by Baba. We reached. As told by him I procured a book ‘Crisis of our Age’ by P.A. Sorokin. It was lying near his bed half read. A book on Yoga and two big volumes of Life Divine by Shri Aurobindo Ghosh were there. We lit the fire. He told that Shomu and Saxena should walk down to Rudraprayag immediately. Both were shocked but could say nothing. As after thought Baba told them to catch the first bus at 5 A.M. Shomu was instructed to meet a priest in some temple there and a letter for Wachaspati of Shrinagar was given to him. Baba told them that in any case they must bring disinfectants by evening or latest by next morning. He told them to take breakfast and then alone leave. Gobind was sent to brew tea for them. Baba gave the following dictation at 3.30 A.M.
“There is one type of weakness ingrained in human nature that very seriously stands in the way of developing an integral personality. You commit a mistake but when the mistake is pointed out by one and who sees into it, he at once by some sort of twist tries to interpret it in a way which is quite different from your original motive. Not that always your will does it consciously. But conscious or subconscious, it does its own mischief, more so, if it is conscious. If this sort of hypocrisy is not caught hold of in its true color and kicked off with necessary moral courage, the mental structure will remain as morbid as ever, the whole progress will be arrested. Just ask yourself whether admitting one’s mistake shows your courage and honesty or by hiding it you get the co-operation and sympathy of your fellow men. Unfortunately many people do not understand this simple canon of creating a healthy and strong atmosphere within him-self and in the environment. It is a grave weakness to suppose if you admit your guilt and mistake, you will be lowered in the estimation of people around. In some cases you may lose but in all cases you gain morally. If the environment is full of small creatures you may lose. If on the other hand you deal with superior type of people the real gain will be there definitely. But irrespective of relative gain or loss, your real gain is cent percent assured.”
“Note, honesty is the best policy, is a shopkeeper’s maxim. To you honesty must be a creed, not a policy. If you take honesty as a policy you will stick to it as long as it pays and as soon as it does not pay, you will give it up. That is not honesty at all.”
All left his hut and I was detained. Even Ramanidada was sent out. Then Baba reminded me that I committed two mistakes during my talk at night and told me to write down the following.
4 A.M.”This note you explain it to Radhakant when he comes.”
(1) His running to the Members of Parliament has been an insult to the Ashram. Why, explain this to him.
(2) It is shameful for the member of the Shaulmari Ashram to run after people for appreciation. Before deciding to take this course, he should have come here to get the assent or dissent and by this insensible act of his, he has not only misrepresented the Ashram – misrepresentation of the moral force that the Ashram wields – but has rendered himself unfit for any further work. Without sense of dignity and self-reverence one cannot represent Ashram. His poor sense of dignity, self reverence and even self-respect will have to be made richer, if anything healthy and genuine is to come out of him. Explain to him letter to Shantiswarup in a manner understandable to him. Crude sense of self-respect will not do. His running to M.P.s is not only against all canons of self-reverence but also against those of the fine sense of self-respect. When you morally bow down your head externally keeping it up and straight is ridiculous.”
We had discussion on Radhakant and I told Baba that only on the previous day he told me that he was fully aware of his limitations and he knew fully well that a fool like him was not going to be appointed as a minister by Baba. Baba would entrust work appropriate to his ability. After relating his sentences in Hindi I said to Baba that Radhakant was very clean and honest at heart. Baba gave a hearty laugh and then told some funny and humorous incidents about him at Almora. Once he lost his path and came alone through dense forest all the while shouting to safeguard himself from wild animals. Another time he told that village was just nearby and made Baba walk for eighteen miles.
Baba then said, “ Suresh, you suggested to put new flesh on the old skeleton but whenever I try in that direction, the plan runs away and away.” My suggestion was to use old Congress people to gain power. He agreed and said, of course, when we have to remould humanity ’ first thing will have to be done is to gain power. I feel like bringing vote of no confidence against the people in power.” I expressed my doubt that if Baba revealed his identity and gave call to the nation to overthrow the Government, there would be riots, lynching of old guards, uncontrollable upheaval and euphoria of the masses would dissolve all barriers of caste, creed and isms. Baba said, “ I and we people will take guarantee to calm down people. First we capture the Central Government and then States. We will have to bring drastic reforms. Sanitation should get priority and right from spitting, people will have to be fined. We will have to institute cases against ministers and their relatives, past and present, simultaneously in the whole country, etc. Money problem will have to be solved immediately. That Chakraborty of Banaras is charging 24 percent interest per annum. About 36 lakh I have to dispense immediately. Let the people coming from abroad to do the temporary arrangement. They will see.”
Baba then said to me, ”At night (1.1.67) you have committed two mistakes unknowingly. Take down for yourself.
This night you have committed two mistakes of expression.
(1)“In a sort of mental agony I told, ‘but there is no money to make necessary arrangement.’ You spontaneously observed ‘we have given whatever we have.’ Now just analyze where the mistake lies. My expression was the outcome of the agonized feelings that whenever in relation to money matter I try to make everything, some hurdle, a resultant of human follies, creeps in but your observation is not the outcome of the realization of this agony and as such you expressed your own helplessness, which is quite irrelevant in the context.”
(2)“The expression should have been let the start of the work be delayed but we cannot bear the sight of your being physically tortured’ instead of saying’ we do not mind about the work but you do not go’.”
I knew my mistakes and before he pointed out I confessed the second mistake. He again and again convinced me by saying that my intention was good but expression was unsophisticated. I admitted that it was due to impact of my regional style.
It was 5 A.M. Baba expressed that he would take rest. In shivering cold I came back to my hut. Shomu and Saxena left for Rudraprayag and I slept.
Got up at 9 A.M. Finished routine and sentry duty. Baba came out and called me with notebook. General topic came for discussion.
Baba said, “Suresh, it is easy to capture East Pakistan. If it is to be taken by arms, it will have to be done within two days so that Chinese or other powers should not meddle. But after taking over whether they should join India or not should be left to their choice. We must conquer their hearts. Azad Kashmir, I am sure, is willing to come in India. People there are very much oppressed. Nehru treated Dalai Lama just like ordinary boy. In fact he is key man so far as Tibetan strategy is concerned.” We had brief talk on other topics and he went in his hut. With two Garhwali servants we began to chop a tree in his courtyard. I took an axe and started cutting the tree, as servants were exhausted. Baba came out and saw me engaged in the process. He stopped me and told to let the servants do that work. The incense was kept burning.
It is 2.30 P.M. I took my lunch and then with a roll of newspaper I began killing flies along with Ramanidada. He called flies as Chinese soldiers and he would pounce on a fly like a panther on a kill.
In the evening Baba came out. He told me that the black woolen sweater, which I purchased for him, he put on for the first time. He observed that it was good and warm. He asked me its price and I informed him that it was a Nepali hand woven wool costing Rs. eighteen. Then together we worked in garden for some time.
The last bus of Okhimath passed on the road above. I told him that the bus halted and someone might have come. He said it did not stop. I told him that it went ahead and stopped at the bifurcation. Therefore a servant was dispatched. Shomu arrived with goods and second servant was sent as he informed arrival of Budhiballabhji too. Both met at Agasti Muni. Shomu came after changing clothes. Shomu told that he received Rs.190/- from the temple at Rudraprayag and Ramesh Saxena went ahead to Shrinagar for purchases. Baba said it was no problem. At the most insecticide would come in double quantity, which would wipe out all flies. Let money go. He then told to open the parcel and examined the goods. He was satisfied and then went inside. He told me to call Budhiballabh after his meals. First he decided to sit outside but seeing the windy cold he told us to accompany him inside his hut. I lit the fire. Budhiballabh told that he was delayed as market was closed (hartal) in support of fast started by Shri Shankaracharya.
Baba then showed us a big poster from a newspaper depicting Prabhudatta and Shankaracharya sleeping and Chavan and Kamraj beheading cow while Indira Gandhi saying that the Center would not pass a law banning cow slaughter. Baba observed, “It is criminal that they appeased Fateh Singh and allowed these people (fasting people) to die. I have all sympathy for this cause of ban on cow slaughter but I am constrained to say that I am against this fast method. These leaders bow before hooligans and not before men of strength. However, this approach of fast will bring communal feelings.”
I pointed out use of calf and cow leather for shoes, which are used by all. I also pointed out that warkha’ that is very thin layer of silver used to decorate sweets or ‘paan’ are prepared by putting silver foil in the intestine of cow and bitten with wooden hammer to thinnest foil called ‘warkha’. On this Baba remarked, “True you are. There is no answer to it. We must develop sentiment. If this fast can bring better rearing of cow, I do not mind but it is not going to do that. The Government is giving economic reason, which is absurd. In Calcutta more than one lakh cattle are slaughtered every year. Look in case of Fateh Singh. He says that “the Government in writing has agreed to give Chandigarh to Punjab and the Government denies it. They must have done so. I am sure.”
“Tomorrow at 9.30 A.M. we shall begin our D.D.T. and fly killing campaign.”
I suggested that let the Sun come overhead when flies would come in warmth. He agreed and told Budhiballabh Penoli to go to Guptakashi in the morning and get spray pumps.
I opened the days’ dak. Budhiballabh’s telegram came after his arrival. There was a telegram for Saxena informing some Pushpa was serious and a letter too in his name. There was a letter from Gyandada from Ashram, which I did not open but handed over to Ramanidada for the sake of privacy. There was one letter from some Raghunandan who was lecturer at B.T.college in Uttarkashi. This fellow was son of an Assistant Magistrate and Baba met them during his walk of the country at Agra. This letter was full of nervous content and Baba dictated the following two letters to him, one in English and another in Hindi in the name of Ramanidada and Samareshwar Dutta respectively. He told to post them in different envelops on different dates. Dictation of first letter is as below.
My dear deserving Raghunandanji,
Received your letter-dated 30.12.66. Life is full of struggle. Life is full of external and internal struggle; this should not disturb you. Along with mental power, patience, and stability, face the external and internal problems and emerge victorious in life through the inner spiritual strength. That is to be real human.
Reach here positively by evening of 15th January. Why are you disturbed when Baba’s blessings are with you?
Accept love and good wishes. Hope you are healthy and well
The draft of second letter in the name of Samareshwar dictated in Hindi and translated is as below:
The following letter has been dictated by Baba.
Accept my Namaskar and best wishes.
Do reach here on the 15th of this month. One thing note, that carelessness and unmannerliness is itself a crime. Modesty, good manners and sobriety, these are the first things needed for marching onward. It is unbecoming of you to address Ramaniji instead of Ramanidada. In future you must be careful to be more mannerly, more respectful about him. Good love and blessings.
It was getting dark. Baba said, “Suresh, probably I have dictated you on this but you take it again.”
He flashed the torch on my notebook and I wrote:
“A really great man does not wait for a problem to come to him. He himself goes to the problem and tackles it rightly. In spite of one’s otherwise greatness if one waits for the problem to come to one and does not go to the problems then at least to that extent one is a mean fellow. Really speaking this approach to life and its problems is an outcome of ingrained meanness. Generally speaking this trend develops in those who suffer from emotionally subjective miserliness and who are after more glamour than after real work.”
As usual I read out the passage and he Okayed it and said, “You can best explain this by giving Gandhiji’s and Nehru’s examples.”
All packs of purchased material were opened. After dinner I had fun with Shomu. He insisted that he was going to remain bachelor in next life too.